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Quit Mode. Quit Dancing?

I'm feeling super tired dis past few days. College is alot harder than high school as they say pero i thought a little harder lang. When i was in high school i used to stay up to 1am when teachers bombards us with homeworks but now 2am is nothing but an everyday routine at kulang pa dahil hindi mo pa matatapos yung iba.

I think some of my blockmates do not experience this pagod especially for those na walang org or any affiliation. Yung trainings sa indayog mejo nag tatake ng time talaga tska mejo nakakapagod rin sya in a sense na hindi mo magawa yung dapat gawin. After class, training, after training, home, after eating dinner, homeworks, endless works, nakakapagod lang.

Pero i'm not yet 100 percent sure kung dapat bang mga quit na sa indayog dahil mejo na s2tress ako. Kasi kapag nag quit ako, opportunity wasted, tapos yung feeling of being able to dance mawawala, yung passion ko di ko ma fu2llfil, ang hirap iwanan yung bagay na gusto mo. Another thing kung bakit iniisip ko mag quit eh kasi my mom and I, hanggang ngayon may conflict kami. Concern kasi sya masyado sa acads ko, palagi nyang pinapakita sakin yung grades nya to remind me na asa UP ako for me to study not to move my body.

This recent week, wala akong kahit anong training hours dahil nag iisip talaga ako kung ano ba dapat kung gawin. After class, I usually go home na for relaxation. I sleep then watch television. Minsan naman dumadaan pakong bookstore to find a book that could advice me for college survivals, ayoko kasing magkamali sa decision ko. Nag work naman sya ng konti sa akin kasi medyo nakapag relax ako. If i will continue to attend training sessions, i'll end up being frustrated na naman at stressed. Yeah, indayog has a real atmosphere of frustrations talaga kasi lahat ng makikita mong gusto mong gawin, hindi mo magawa.

Its not on the people naman or the indayog, its about me, i've been absorbing things wrongly. I'm not thinking the brighter way. Dapat kasi kapag nakikita ko sila na may nagagawa na gusto ko ring gawin, dapat yun ay magiging inspiration to strive harder, to attend trainings frequently para matutunan. Madali kasing sumuko si cleve. Arrrgggg. Bakit kaya suko na kagad ako? Ambilis. ttttsssssskkkkk...

Let me fly.

"Kapag di ka makapag decide sa isang bagay, mag toss coin ka, maririnig mo na lang yung sarili mo kung ano ba talagang gusto mo"

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